The Central Part of His Plan: The Family

It is probably pretty true to say that nothing in life can bring us more joy and happiness or frustration and anger than our family. Despite the varying emotional distresses that we all go through, I believe, for the most part – we would defend and protect our families until the very end.

One of the major principles taught in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is God’s plan for happiness. Another way to refer to it is, The Plan of Salvation. This “plan” was taught to all of us in the pre-existence (before we were born). We were taught about agency, receiving a body, and what Christ would do to save us all (and much more). A major factor which was included in this plan, is our families. We believe: “The family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children… In the premortal realm; spirit sons and daughters knew and worshiped God as their Eternal Father and accepted His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of eternal life.” (https://www.lds.org/liahona/2004/12/strengthening-the-family-the-family-is-central-to-the-creators-plan?lang=eng)

I hope you will click on the link above. This article is found on www.lds.org and explains in more depth about the importance of families & how the family is "under attack." It is Satan’s plan to destroy and break up families. He desires us all to be miserable just like himself (2 Nephi 2:27).  All families struggle from time to time. We need to seek ways to repent and forgive. By doing so, we build a stronger unit and bond that is much harder to break. When principles of Jesus Christ are taught within the family, happiness will be found. The Atonement of Jesus Christ makes repentance and forgiveness possible for all people; we just need to use it and apply it into our lives.

I told my followers (readers) of this blog that my intention was to share with all my feelings and ideas about marriage and family. I cannot stress enough how important I feel family is. If you find yourself in a situation where you feel lost, afraid or confused – my advice is to pray. God loves you & every one of us. He is available whenever we need him. He will lift your burdens and give you strength. He wants to see you happy and successful. He also knows we are going to have trials and struggles but keep in mind; he hasn’t abandoned us during those hard times. We just need to realize and accept that he stands at the door, waiting to let us in.

I love Jesus Christ. He is the Savior to the world. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is His church; and His gospel. I know we have a living prophet today that talks to and communes with God. He reveals to His prophets and apostles what we need to know to continue living His commandments. When life gets confusing, or when the world seems to be “shouting” things really loud; I know I can turn to Him for peace and receive the blessings & answers needed. I know a place to go to find truth, that place in on my knees. Prayer is essential and it is there for all.  If you are seeking answers and want to know what is true – turn to God and he will lead you in the right direction. He will continue to bless you and your family.

Precious Life

A quick quote that I thought was cute: “When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.”

 ~ Nora Ephron, journalist, playwright & screen writer.

There are a lot of things in life that I consider very precious (golden rings included, my wedding ring). Pizza for example is one that is hard for me to live without. Indoor plumbing is another example of preciousness, especially while camping. Both my dogs, Hannah and Ginger are precious part of my life – I love these little rascals dearly. On a spiritual level, I would say my family, faith and religion are the most precious of all. Family and faith makes up a lot of who I am.

As I sit here contemplating how precious my children and family are to me, I find myself thinking about the sanctity of human life. I cannot imagine EVER where my life would be today if either one of my children were to die. I would be devastated. Life is so fragile; it can be gone in an instant.

Why is life so important to many of us, and first and foremost, why is it so important to our Heavenly Father? Life is important to many of us because life is where we find out who we are. Its where we learn, grow and love.  I also believe with all my heart that we are all Gods children. “Each human being, no matter how young or how small, is a ‘beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and as such, each has a divine nature and destiny’” (Defending the Sanctity of Life, p. 291). When we welcome children into our lives, we are demonstrating to Jesus Christ that we are ready to become more like him. Every child has a right to life and to receive his or her body, grow and learn, and one day, return back to the presence of God.

I am a “follower” on the Facebook page called, “On Line for Life”. It is a page that is solely dedicated to raise awareness about the evils of abortion. It is a page to advocate the sanctity of life and to plead for the rights of the unborn child. The messages we hear today out in the “world” tell us that a woman has a right to do what she pleases with her body. However, do we ever hear about the right to save the baby’s body? What about the father of the baby, what about his choice. Abortion is a tragedy for everyone involved.

More action needs to be made to save these precious-innocent lives. There are appropriate ways to defend life and to stand up and fight against these laws that permit it. Fighting violence with violence is never the answer. 

I have barely scraped the surface about my feelings against abortion, but let me leave you with some wise words from Mother Teresa (Catholic Humanitarian and Nobel Peace Prize Recipient):

               Many people are concerned with children of India, with the children of Africa where quite a few die of hunger, and so on. Many people are also concerned about the violence in this great country of the United States. These concerns are very good. But often these same people are not concerned with the millions being killed by the deliberate decision of their own mothers. And this is the greatest destroyer of peace today- abortion which brings people to such blindness.  

      By abortion the Mother does not learn to love, but kills her own child to solve her problems. And, by abortion, that father is told that he does not have to take any responsibility at all for the child he has brought into the world. The father is likely to put other women to the same trouble. So abortion leads to more abortion. Any country that accepts abortion is not teaching its people to love but to use violence to get what they want. This is why the greatest destroyer of love and peace is abortion" ." 

(https://sites.google.com/site/faithfulcatholics/Home/pro-life-quotations-of-mother-teresa)

Forgiveness & Forgetting

It has been said before that once you truly forgive; you should forget as well. That is a tough order. I understand the concept of forgiveness, but how does one forget? Does “forgetting” mean that there is a blank space in your mind; a lost memory? For me personally, I feel that “forgetting” means that once you have forgiven someone, you stop dwelling on it. You find the power somewhere deep inside of you and make the choice to stop thinking about it or “hashing it out” over and over. True peace will come to a person once he or she has forgiven, moved on and stopped thinking about it.

Repenting and forgiveness in family life are probably one of the most important things we can do to strengthen our lives and our families. In chapter twenty of my text book, it states, “In families, repentance and forgiveness blend into an interactive process that is strengthened by family members’ commitment to each other” (as cited by Finkel, Rusbult, Kumashiro, & Hannon, 2002, p.201). I found this statement very profound because it backs up what I have always believed; having a commitment to one another means that we don’t give up and walk away. It is imperative to find solutions to our problems, get past the hurt, forgive and forget.

It has been my personal experience how quickly tension is defused between two people when an offer of or the acceptance of an apology is given. I have found the love and closeness between my husband and I grow stronger when we strive to live by this principle. Christ has commanded us to forgive. He has said, “I the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you, it is required to forgive all men” (Doctrine & Covenants 64:10).

Forgiveness is not the easiest thing to do. In some cases, it may take a whole-life time to forgive someone. Horrible acts are committed on others all the time, but those who have chosen the path of forgiveness, have found greater strength and peace. They have moved on with their lives with grace, and they find that they are happier. They also are able to forget, meaning it doesn't consume their thoughts anymore. I have experienced this. I arrived to a point in my life where I needed to offer forgiveness. After much prayer, I knew this was what Heavenly Father wanted for me. It was a process, and it didn't happen overnight but as the days went on, I was beginning to see my burden lifted. The frustration and confusion that plagued my thoughts started to cease. This was a gift only Jesus Christ could give. For that gift, I will be eternally grateful! 

Below is a beautiful true story of a man that offered forgiveness to a teenage boy while driving intoxicated, killed his wife, who was pregnant & two other children. This story explains in a much more powerful way the meaning of forgiving and forgetting:

Prayer and Faith: You can’t have one without the other

Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints means so much more than just being a “Mormon.” For my husband and me, it is a lifestyle.  We believe that choosing to live this way has deep eternal consequences attached. We made the concrete decision to raise and teach our daughters to know these truths, why these truths are important, and in turn; we have the hope that they too will choose the same pattern.

Faith and prayer are a part of these truths that I speak of. Parents who have a central faith integrated into their families have a higher chance of staying together. They share a common bond that allows them to have reasons and incentives to make their marriages and families work. Take prayer for example, there have been scientific studies and research that have found that prayer has been an essential factor for families that have been built stronger bonds with each other. Prayer was taught to me by my parents; my husband learned to pray from his parents, and together we have taught our daughters to pray as well. We agree with John, when he wrote: “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in faith" (3 John 1:4). Teaching my daughters to pray, I feel is the best way for me to teach them about faith. Prayer and faith go hand-n-hand. It takes great faith to pray, and prayer will build faith. How can I expect my daughters to walk in faith if I don’t teach them about these principles?

Prayer will help build a sacred bond not only between you and family members, but also with God. It allows a couple to show gratitude during the good times, and it gives them strength during the bad ones. When prayer is viewed as something sacred, then it will be taken much more seriously. Nathan M. Lambert who is a professor of Family Life at Brigham Young University, wrote: “Drawing on the powers of heaven through prayer is a powerful resource available to couples that can make a good relationship better and can heal a faltering marriage” (p.198). Prayer is influential; it will give aid to all who use it sincerely and who are seeking for that divine communication between him and God.

My own children have been wonderful examples to me. Now that they are teens, I am pleased to see that they love to pray, believe in it and are willing to offer prayers on the behalf of others who may be in need. As a young mother, I was so concerned about teaching my daughters the right things. Never would I have understood during that time, that one day they would be teaching me. No matter what one’s faith or religion is, if he or she develops at the least, these two principles, faith and prayer, then I really believe that their lives will have more meaning and peace.

Feel free to follow this link to read more on prayer: 

A House of Prayer

Just as we want our children to turn to us for counsel and comfort, our Heavenly Father wants us to turn to Him. He asks that we “pray always, and be believing” (D&C 90:24).  When our children kneel with us in prayer and hear ourpleadings in their behalf, the foundation of prayer is laid in their own lives.